Things I am Not Allowed to do in Victorian England
by AddienaTheBlueSpirit
Summary: Three of my friends and I get sent into Black Butler... This is a list of things we have done there... Rule 0: Since I know that this list is more likely to encourage you to make the same mistakes my friends and I did rather than discourage you from it. It would be a good idea to see the Undertaker about measurements for your coffin...You will more than likely need it.
1. Chapter 1

Things I am Not Allowed to Do in Victorian England

**Rule 0-**Since I know that this list is more likely to encourage you to make the same mistakes my friends and I did rather than discourage you from it. It would be a good idea to see the Undertaker about measurements for your coffin. You will more than likely need it.

**Rule 1-** saying that you are the love child of Grell and Sebastian is highly discouraged…by everyone.

**Rule 2-** Do not use having the same name as your friend to postpone doing your job.

Sebastian: "Addiena Please do the Laundry."

Addiena and Addilynne: "Which Addiena?"

Sebastian: **Twitch** "Grrr."

Addilynne: "Maybe you should just call me Addilynne…"

Sebastian: "Grrr."

Damian: "Uh, Mr. Sebastian, Sir… your Demonic Aura's showing…"

Sebastian: **Turns to Damian** "Grrr."

Ciara: **See this and runs for her life**

**Rule 3- **Grell impersonation contests are strictly Prohibited at Phantomhive Manor.

Damian: "Bassie! Oh Bassie!"

Addiena: "Not so fast! DEATH!" **Strikes up Grell's Death Pose** "She's not supposed to die until tomorrow!"

Sebasian: "Get. To. Work."

Addilynne and Ciara: "But we didn't do anything!"

Sebastian: "Exactly…"

Addilynne and Ciara: "Boo."

**Rule 4- **Just because he is called the Queen's Guard Dog, does not mean that I can tell Ciel to "Sit", "Stay", "Roll over", or "Play Dead".

**Rule 5-** Not all redheads with chainsaws are Grell Sutcliff.

Addilynne: "Sebastian said to remove the trees Finny killed… This chainsaw should make that easy!"

Addiena: "Ack! It's Grell Sutcliff!"

Damian **Hopeful** and Sebastian **Annoyed**: "Where!"

Addiena: "There!" **Points**

Damian **Disapointed** Sebastian **Relieved**: "Oh…It's just Addilynne…"

**Rule 6-** The "To-Die" list does not work like a Death Note.

Addiena: **Grabs Grell's "To Die" list and writes Addilynne's name down on it.**

Grell: **Sings** "That's not going to work!"

Addiena: "Wha…"

**The ink spelling "Addiena Lynne Wraith" vanishes.**

Addiena: **Disappointed** "Oh." **Curious** "How did you know that wouldn't work?"

Grell: "She tried the samething with your name yesterday…"

Addiena: "What!"

**Rule 7-** Don't leave Addilynne and Lizzy alone in the same room…EVER!

**Ciara, Ciel, Grell, Damian, Addiena, and Sebastian walk into the Mansion and are greeted by…**

Finnian, Meyrin, and Bardroy ** Tied up in decorative ribbons used for wrapping presents**: "Young Master, Mr. Sebastian, Miss Addiena, Mr. Damian, Miss Ciara! HELP US!

Addiena and Sebastian: "Too much cuteness…"

Damian and Grell: "too much pink…"

Ciara: "Must-"

Ciel: "-Gouge-

Ciara: "-Eyes-"

Ciel: "-Out."

Sebastian: "Addiena, Please fix this…"

Addiena: "But…"

Sebastian: "Or you will go without dinner…"

Addiena: "But…"

Sebastian: "Forever."

Addiena: "Fine."

**Rule 8-** If it was not around in the 19th century it won't work in the 19th century.

**Rule 9-** Telling Grell that "regardless of his hair color he's still a blond" is pointless… He's too blond to get it.

**Rule 10-** Referring to Ronald Knox as Alfred F. Jones is also pointless… as Hetalia won't be invented until 2006.

**Rule 11-** For the same reason as the above, making Harry Potter References to William T. Spears is just plain stupid.

Addilynne: "What! It was Funny!"

Addiena: "He didn't get it!"

Addilynne: "That's what made it funny!"

**Rule 12-** No, if William Spears is shivering it doesn't make him William "Shake" Spears.

**Rule 13- **I am not aloud to teach Grell the Lyric's to "Only Girl" by Rihanna and tell him that It's says "the Only Grell in the World".

Grell **Dressed in a red dress and singing**: I want you to love me like I'm a hot ride

Be thinkin' of me, doin' what you like

So boy, forget about the world 'cause it's gon' be me and you tonight

I wanna make your bed for ya, then I'ma make you swallow your pride.

Want you to make me feel like I'm the only Grell in the world

Like I'm the only one that you'll ever love

Like I'm the only one who knows your heart

Only Grell in the world.

Sebastian** Walks into the room and sees Grell**: "ADDIENA CERULEA SPECTRE!"

Addiena: EEEP! **Runs**

**Rule 14**- We are not aloud to call Alois Trancy "The Creepy Blond Kid Who's Stalking Ciel"…

**Rule 15**- Even if it's true.


	2. Chapter 2

**Rule 16-**If you are offered a large sum of money to do something "Only you can do"… It's probably not worth it.

**Rule 17-** Damian and Addiena are not allowed to stalk Grell.

Addiena and Damian: **Holding banoculars** "Heh Heh…Grell."

~At Phantomhive Manor~

Sebastian: "The house is most certainly quite today… I only had to clean up one mess… and Addiena and Damian haven't made a mess yet..." **Pauses** "Addilynne, Ciara... where are Addiena and Damian?"

Ciara: "St...St...St..."

Sebastian: "I'm waiting..."

Addilynne: "Stalking Grell, please don't eat us!"

~With Addiena and Damian~

Sebastian: ** Grabs them by the collars and drags them off.**

**Rule 18-**They are not allowed to hide Grell's make up.

**Rule 19-**They are not allowed to tell Grell that Black is the new Red… Ever… Seriously, it's not worth it.

**Rule 20-** Intentionally slowing down Sebastian's work so he doesn't see the mess you made is not a good idea… you will not be fed… for a very very very long time…unless you want to risk eating Bardroy's cooking.

**Rule 21**- Modifying Bardroy's flamethrower so it's more powerful is not allowed… Ever.

Addiena and Damian: **Hi-five** "Worth it!"

Ciara: "Really Guys!"

Addilynne: "Ever heard of Collateral Damage?"

Addiena and Damian: **Shrug** "Still worth it."

**Rule 22-** Stealing Mey-Rin's glasses is not a good idea.

Meyrin: **staggers down the hall, leaving a wake of debris behind her** "Has anyone seen my glasses?"

Ciara: **Whistles, twirling Meyrin's glasses around her index finger**

Sebastian: Oh, good… You found Meyrin's glasses… **Grabs them from her** Now you can clean up the mess caused by her far-sighted-ness…"

Ciara: "Boo."

**Rule 23-** Acting like a cat gets you out of trouble, not out of doing your job.

**Rule 24-** I am not allowed to send Sebastian flowers and say their from Grell.

Addiena: "Sebastian! These were on the door step! They say their for you!"

Sebastian: "What is it now?"

Addiena: "Flowers!"

Sebastian: "Oh?"

Addiena: "From GRELL!"

Sebastian: "Oh."

**Rule 25-** I'm not allowed to send flowers to Grell and say they're from Sebastian.

Grell: "Oh, Sabas-chan! Miss me!?"

Sebastian: "Go away."

Grell: "But… but… the flowers."

Sebastian: "Yes… please refrain from sending me more."

Grell: "I didn't… you sent them to me…"

Sebastian: "I did no such thing…"

Grell and Sebastian: "Addiena!"

Addiena: "Ack!" **Runs**

**Rule 26-** Impersonating a member of Scotland Yard is a Crime…

**Rule 27-** but impersonating a Death God is Suicide.

Addiena: **In Grell Cosplay** "La-dee-da!"

William T. Spears: "Sutcliff, quit dreaming about that damn demon and get to work!"

Addiena: "Ack! Sebastian? Gross! Er… I mean… Don't talk about my Bassie like that!"

William T. Spears: "Ms. Spectre, Where is the real Grell…"

Addiena: "Stalking Sebastian… Please don't kill me!"

**Rule 28-**I am not allowed to ask the Shinigami what the human form of their Death Scythes look like.

**Rule 29**- Just because someone has gardening tools does not make them a Death God.

Addiena ** sees Finnian in the garden**: "Ack! There's a Death God!"

Damian: "Where!"

Addiena: **Points**

Damian: "Ack!"

Addiena: **Concerned** "What!?"

Damian: That's Finny, Addiena.

Addiena: Ack! Finnian's a Death God!?

Damian: "How did you figure that?"

Addiena: "He has gardening tools…"

Damian: "So? He's a gardener…"

Addiena: "Oh… yeah…"

**Rule 30**- We are not allowed to steal Grell's Glasses.

**Rule 31**- Or William's…

**Rule 32-** Or any other Shinigami's…

**Rule 33- **Even if Sebastian is the one who suggests it…

**Rule 33.5-** If Rule 33 makes no sense, refer back to Rule 16.


	3. Chapter 3

**Rule 34-** It is not a good idea to beat up Lizzy for liking Ciel...

Kat: **Beats up Lizzy**

Ciel: "Sebastian! Do something!"

Sebastian: "Addiena! Clean this mess up."

Addiena: **Sees the fight** "I'm just a slave to you… aren't I?" **Grabs a broom and chases Kat away from Lizzy**

Ciel: "Are you alright Lizzy?"

Lizzy: "I think so…"

Addiena: **Returns with leaves and tangles in her hair and her cloths torn** "I - pant pant - get dinner for - huff huff - this…Right?"

Sebastian: **Looks to Ciel, who nods** "Of course."

Addiena: **Grins**

**Rule 35- **We are not allowed to tell Prince Soma that the fact he is the _26_th son is not impressive…

Soma: **Sobs into Addiena's shoulder**

Addiena: **Pats Soma's head** "There… There…"

~Elsewhere~

Sebastian: **Shaking his finger** "Rude…blah blah… Guest… blah blah… Soma… blah blah… No dinner."

Ciara, Damian, and Addilynne: **Heads down** "Yes, Sebastian."

**Rule 36- **Even if it's true…

Soma:**Sobs harder** "So mean."

Addiena: **continues patting his head** "Yep."

~Elsewhere~

Sebastian: **Shaking his finger at Ciara, Damian, ** "Rude…blah blah… Guest… blah blah… Soma… blah blah… No dinner…blah blah…walk Pluto… Blah blah… one month"

Ciara, Damian, and Addilynne: **Heads down** "Yes, Sebastian."

**Rule 37- **Addilynne and Ciara are not allowed to call Grell "Slut-cliff"… Even if Sebastian pays them to…

Grell: "WHAT DID YOU CALL ME!" **Chases Ciara and Addilynne**

Ciara and Addilynne: **To a passing Sebastian** "HELP US!"

Sebastian: ** Sits beside Addiena, Ciel, and Damian and watches the two being chased.** "He hasn't caught them yet?"

Damian: "Nope."

Addiena: "It's hilarious…" **holds out a bowl of candies to Ciel**, "Want some?"

Ciel: **Grabs a candy** "Oh, and we now owe Addiena a day off… as I assumed they would have been captured by now…"

Damian: "If Will shows up… you owe me a day off too."

Ciel: "He won't…"

Grell: **Still chasing Addilynne and Ciara** "GET BACK HERE…."

Ciara and Addilynne: "NEVER!" ** huff huff **

William: **Grabs Grell** "Lets go Sutcliff…"

Ciara and Addilynne: **Collapse on all four panting for breath** "Thank you for saving us Mr. Spears, sir!"

Sebastian: "It seems all four of them get a day off…"

Ciel: "All four?"

Sebastian: "Miss Spectre and Mr. Ross due to your bets… and Addilynne and Ciara for somehow surviving to reap the reward I promised them…"

Ciel: "Reward?"

Sebastian: "For calling Grell "slut-cliff" of course…"

Ciel: "Ah… yes, of course..."

**Rule 38- **Hitting on Ronald Knox is a waste of time…

Addiena: "Hi, you're cute…let's go out!"

Ronald: "O-okay…"

William and Sebastian: "Knox/Spectre! Get back to work!"

Addiena and Ronald: "Awe." **Dragged off by their bosses.**

**Rule 39- **Complaining about Sebastian working you too hard, will only cause him to work you harder.

**Rule 40- **Sending Grell love notes and signing Sebastian's name only get you in more trouble with Sebastian.

**Rule 41- **Shouting "China! I choose you!" every time you see Lao, is offensive.

**Rule 42- **If you are a girl, or feminine guy… do not go to any attended/hosted by the Viscount of Druitt… your life depends on it.

**Rule 43- **I am not allowed to sneak out and meet Ronald Knox for the date he promised me.

**Rule 44-** We are not allowed to try to make Ciel cry…

**Rule 45-** Do not ask Grell for a makeover…

**Rule 46- **Do not ask Lizzy for a makeover.

**Rule 47- **I am not allowed to use my knowledge of the Anime to scam people…

**Rule 48- **No matter how tempting it may be.


End file.
